286: Behind the Scenes with Dr. Abby: Celebrity Relationships, Loyalty, and Reputation in the Spotlight

Transcript

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Hey everyone, welcome back to the PR Breakdown, where we deep dive into strategies behind managing media, public relations and crisis communication.

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As always, I'm your host, molly McPherson, and today is really tonight, because I just finished a live with I don't know one of my favorites out there, monthly in my Patreon.

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If you're not familiar with Patreon, it's a website that allows you to bring all of your patrons together into one community and in that community you can do whatever you want.

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A lot of podcasters, a lot of content creators have.

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Patreon Substack is for newsletters, you know people writing content.

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I love to have lives, so I tend to drop my podcast early.

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You'll get an early episode release in my Patreon.

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And then we have these weekly streams as well, and this community is such a great community and it's growing every single day, and in these weeklies we just bring this collection of people together and now we get a lot of the same people who come back, you know, week after week, and they drop in and everyone has diverse backgrounds.

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We're all from different places, different ages.

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Love it when we talk about certain people and we have to educate certain people in the community on who they are Like.

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For example, a couple of weeks ago we talked about Garth Brooks and you know from a previous episode we had talked about Garth Brooks's current problem with the lawsuit and the allegations made by a former hairstylist and makeup artist.

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And I loved one of our community members, liz, who just has the courage to come on and say, could you just help me out here, who's Garth Brooks?

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And then we have every Gen Xer just piling in there, not piling on, but with every weird dusty memory we can think of.

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And one of the funnier ones is when they were explaining it, explaining who Garth Brooks was.

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It was his song played at the end of every wedding in the 90s.

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You know, friends in Low Places, that's what I'm talking about.

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Like I haven't thought about that song being played at weddings in 20 years.

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When somebody said that, it just made me crack up.

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That's why this community is fantastic.

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So we have people from all ages, all backgrounds, both genders.

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We have people who are the celebrity files.

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We have people who love PR.

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We have people who love scandal.

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We have people who just love community and getting to know these people on these lives.

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It's just fun.

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So I definitely urge you to check it out.

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It's patreoncom slash, molly McPherson.

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I will include a link in the show notes.

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But tonight we talked about the topic was a different one.

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You know, abby and I were really, we were really first planning to speak about Sean Combs, p Diddy, and the more we talked about it.

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Abby, who is a therapist, psychologist, phd she's the one who said you know, the topic might be triggering for some people because of the things that he's done.

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They're so bad, which is true, you know.

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So many people ask me about him from a PR perspective, but it's so hard to do the PR perspective when he's done such horrible things he's been accused, I should say, of doing such horrible things.

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I don't like talking about it.

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So when public moves are made, like when a lawyer makes a statement, when he does something, when it involves framing or reputation or the legality of it all, then I'll chime in.

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But when it's just talking about things that he's done, I'm out too and I was so happy or grateful I should say that Dr Abbey said that because I really didn't want to get into that.

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So she came up with a topic that was a little more benign but interesting nonetheless.

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She was interested in this idea of people who get married early, like when they're high school sweethearts or they meet young and then all of a sudden, someone hits it big.

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So the inspiration was drawn from Patrick Mahomes and Brittany Mahomes.

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You know, they were high school sweethearts I believe they were high school sweethearts, but they got married right away and now she is definitely part of his brand.

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She's all over his Instagram, buddy Buddy, up with Travis and Taylor Swift.

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Certainly they're now co-owners of the Kansas City Current, the NWSL soccer team there, the women's league.

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They make it as if, you know, she is the co-owner, but really, you know, patrick Mahomes is, you know, is behind that.

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You know she is the owner, but really you know Patrick Mahomes is, you know, is behind that.

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But that was our launching point and Abby was so great because we started there and we just talked about or we should say she talked about why people, in particular, particularly men, that they might get married early in life, you know, and why athletes are interesting is because athletes that are great in high school and great in college they know they're going to be great and so they want to have a person with them.

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So, yes, it could be someone that they absolutely love, but they're dating.

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But for many people who did not marry their high school sweetheart.

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You know that your relationship in high school is much different than your relationship in college, your relationship when you meet someone when you're 30, for instance.

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But they cling on to this sweetheart because they don't want to go into it alone and they want to have someone with them.

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And there are many cases where they do stay together because there's that security there.

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So she mentioned so many different couples.

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You know who are like this and a lot of them, you know, were athletes.

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She talked about Shaq, she talked about Shaquille O'Neal, she talked about Snoop, talked about Jon Bon Jovi A lot of these long-term marriages and partnerships which then led us into this topic of well, what about the ones who are cheating?

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Because someone in the group had mentioned Bruce Springsteen and, like I'm looking at the chat right now, justin, the guy from this Is Us Justin Hartley, ethan Slater and Ariana Grande.

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We talked about Dave Chappelle and his wife, bruce Springsteen and his wife, and then someone wrote is Bruce Springsteen married?

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Robert Smith from the Cure and his wife, mary Poole, met when they were in middle school and of course, dr Abbey said oh yeah, my uncle managed the Cure and managed them.

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She knows absolutely everybody, but then started naming, you know, like all these names and of course we go into, you know, travis and Taylor.

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And then we talked about Steven Spielberg.

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We talked about Jeff Bezos, lauren Sanchez, bill Gates, melinda Gates and Abbey, then discussed how divorce happened.

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When we talked about grade divorce and we talked about really I think it was her who brought up Martin Short and Meryl Streep, which give me my, the most favorite person on the planet to me is Martin Short.

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I mean by far and away.

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I am watching Murders in the Building with Meryl Streep, season three on it, but give me Clifford.

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And then Abby remarked that you know, meryl Streep is so familiar with a lot of these divorces, these great divorces, and she said many times it's females, it's the women who leave men because they've had it, they've just had it.

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She said men most times will stay in the marriage because they already have what they want.

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They have someone at home, they have someone who's making dinner, they have someone who's dealing with the kids, perhaps the grandkids, and the guys can do whatever they want.

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I mean typically she's saying this as a therapist with her clients.

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She said rarely, rarely, rarely is a man leaving a woman.

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Rarely, because she said men don't want to be alone, men want to have that companionship.

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And she said it's not very often that you're going to get a guy who gets divorced and then is okay being divorced, they're okay being alone, which I found interesting.

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I certainly found that interesting.

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So she did talk about.

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And then she even said, like with Martin Short and Meryl Streep she said so often, even when it's older, it's not even about sex anymore, it's so much of it is about companionship and having that loving companionship.

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And then we started talking about Ellen DeGeneres, because someone brought up Ellen DeGeneres and Portia and then I went on my I'll call it a riff, even though it was stronger than a riff.

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I'm not going to call it a tirade, but after watching Ellen DeGeneres on the Netflix special I watched it the night before I did an interview with Melissa Etheridge for the Public Relations Society of America.

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They asked me to be the moderator not really moderator, because I was the only one interviewing.

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I interviewed her and my gosh, it was such an honor to be able to do that.

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So I spoke at 1030, I think, and I was finished at 1130.

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And then I immediately had to go.

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They came and they said they came to get me and they said Melissa is waiting.

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I was like, oh okay, so the people who were standing there waiting to talk and take photos and selfies, which was so much fun.

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I had to leave to go back and talk to Melissa.

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And I did talk to her backstage and we talked about a lot of different people, because Melissa Etheridge knows everyone in Hollywood.

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But I did ask her about Ellen DeGeneres and Melissa was telling me she she felt bad for Ellen and she said you know, ellen just doesn't understand.

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You know all the hate and Abby was saying that as well.

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You know that.

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You know Ellen was a big deal, you know, especially in the nineties when she was one of the first to come out for being gay, and Melissa Etheridge was as well from the musical piece of it and she was blackballed, whereas Melissa was celebrated for it and her career took off.

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Ellen DeGeneres was definitely blackballed and I do remember that and I would agree to that.

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And then Abby was remarking about couples.

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She said think about it.

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Everybody does it.

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You may think that you're the person in your relationship who empties the dishwasher, but then your husband might come out and say you know, you're not doing anything.

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You're like, what?

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Like?

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I emptied the dishwasher, I drove the kids, I did all these different things.

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Just because someone says you're a certain way doesn't mean that you are, which I agreed 100%.

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But I said, Abby, this goes into the realm of public relations and reputation management.

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I said now we're sitting firmly in my lane and the mistake that Ellen DeGeneres made, of course, is this take where she's blaming the public for her plight.

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There's been so many instances where Ellen, ellen DeGeneres has been called out for not being nice.

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Now, had Ellen DeGeneres just come out in her special and made jokes about being labeled as nice when you're not nice and turn it into humor now that would have been unbelievable and people would have loved it and it probably would have resurrected her career.

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Honestly.

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But instead, if you watched it, she came out and complained.

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She basically blamed the public for her lie.

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She blamed the public for labeling her as kind.

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It wasn't her choice to be labeled as kind and if there's stories that came out that she's not kind, well, it's not my fault.

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I didn't say that I was kind and it was just a horrible take.

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It was a horrible, horrible take and that's the nuance.

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That's the nuance and you have to thread a needle and sometimes you get right dead center and you do it, but many times you don't.

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In this case, ellen DeGeneres didn't do it, she did not do it.

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You can't.

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You cannot blame people in a public statement, much less a Netflix special.

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Also, when you're not funny anymore.

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She was funny during her time in the nineties, but she also it wasn't funny.

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I mean, she had a couple funny lines in there, but that's the end.

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That's the end of Ellen.

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As far as I'm concerned, that is the very end.

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But Abby did such a remarkable job.

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We talked about Jeff Bezos.

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We talked about Jeff Bezos with Lauren Sanchez, where she also said it's likely that he's already started cheating on Lauren Sanchez, but he's not going to get rid of Lauren Sanchez.

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We talked about Bill and Melinda Gates.

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That Melinda was, you know, obviously the one who said you know, I'm kind of tired of this.

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You know that Bill was kind of skirting around.

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Also, someone in the in the community said in the chat you know he, he was tied into the Jeffrey Epstein piece as well.

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But a great question from the community does every famous person go through things like this, or some so strong, or some so strongly who they are that success doesn't change them.

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And Abby was saying it's just said such a great line and she quoted like Chris Rock and I'm not going to get this line right Like, a guy is only as faithful as his opportunity.

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You know, and when you're famous, you have so many opportunities that come to you that you, that people, just can't resist them anymore.

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So that's why it you know, celebrities singers, athletes, rock stars it's really hard for them to stay faithful because there's just so many opportunities where being unfaithful is presented to them and then they often have long suffering wives who stay there with them.

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But it was a great chat.

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So this week on the podcast, it's quick, it's fast, because I do have a big, big masterclass coming next week, november 6.

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It's all about online backlash, how to manage it.

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So certainly that we have a link in the show notes if you want to join me for that, 12pm 3pm, 8pm Eastern Time how to manage online backlash.

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So, especially if you're in communication or your brand or your name, I'm definitely going to urge you to join me in that free masterclass.

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But also join us in Patreon, because these weekly chats are so interesting, the community is interesting and it's really the extension of this podcast.

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Now, I know you're listening to this, thinking where's the music?

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Where's the point?

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Where's everything?

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This is the point that I have been traveling for weeks on end.

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Really for all of October I have been traveling, and even right now I have to leave and drive three and a half hours back to New York, where I was this morning.

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So that's where this podcast is landing.

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I thought I'm just going to do a wrap up on an amazing chat that we had on Patreon, and I definitely encourage you to join me there, especially when Dr Abby is there.

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But we're also going to have other guests.

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Vanessa Gregoriatis is going to be back.

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She is a long-form journalist, but she's won so many awards for her writing.

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But she's interviewed Taylor Swift a few times, justin Bieber, justin Timberlake she's someone who always, always has a great story.

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We were going to talk about Elon Musk as someone who we were going to mention because in her podcast she talked about him.

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We're going to have Dr Kathy Nickerson.

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She's a specialist in affairs, so I love having people on here who give education and background and just a deeper dives on certain areas.

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And then, certainly weekly, I'm in here as well, and we're just chatting about all the things that are happening out there right now.

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So that's what I have for this week, you know, on the podcast.

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On the podcast because it's quick and I feel like I've met most of you anyway in just the last few weeks, of all my travels and all the talks, from Calgary to New York City, to Sacramento, to Boston, to New York, to Albany, I've just been everywhere back to New England.

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It's been, it's been quite a run, you guys.

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So hope you can join me next week for the masterclass on November 6.

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And then I certainly hope that you can join me in Patreon, because it's a great extension of this podcast.

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And boy are we having a great time.

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So that's all for this week on the podcast.

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Thanks so much for listening, thanks so much for joining and for supporting and being a part of this community.

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Bye for now.

286: Behind the Scenes with Dr. Abby: Celebrity Relationships, Loyalty, and Reputation in the Spotlight

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