258: Behind the Words: Unveiling the Spin and Subtext in the Jonas-Turner Divorce

Transcript

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In almost every celebrity scandal or PR crisis, every move, every statement carries weight, often telling a story that transcends the words we read or hear in the media.

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Last week, it seemed like everyone on social media was smarter than the team behind these PR moves.

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He's calling the paparazzi on himself, like yesterday there was a shot of him with the with the three-year-old having lunch.

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There's a spin here that I don't understand, but I think there's a prenup.

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Welcome to the Indestructible PR Podcast.

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I'm Molly McPherson, your frontline crisis communication strategist, here to turn crises, bad news and scandal into lessons in resilient reputation building.

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Each week, I go beyond the buzz, finding trending news and pop culture moments to unveil the PR mastery or blunders that shape the perception you see online.

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Join me as we go behind the headlines.

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Last week, the world watched as a very high profile relationship unfolded into drama as the news leaked out over the possible divorce of Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner.

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When the news leaked out, the media was on fire.

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First came the leak, then came the opinion, then came the official statement.

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When they announced the divorce through their joint statement on social media, they were asking for calls for privacy and respect.

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The whole narrative was polished, but it was certainly a counter to what everyone witnessed over the weekend.

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So let's carefully chosen words.

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The orchestrated PR moves to expose a deeper story that might be lurking underneath, a story driven not by the end of a marriage but by the underlying currents of moves.

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How do people change perception in the midst of a PR scandal?

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This isn't just a story about two celebrities.

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It's a story about perception.

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In this episode, let's explore the telltale signs of a planted story and a sculpted statement that might suggest a narrative more complex than what is portrayed, a narrative where PR spin may have played roles behind the scenes.

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But first, before we get started, if you want to join me in a conversation about this topic and other types of topics that we see in the news and on social media, join me in my PR confidential community.

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I will answer your questions.

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So a lot of people ask me questions all over social media.

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I don't have as much time to do it there because I'm not on my phone all day, contrary to what you might think based on my social media posts.

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But I am on my computer and every day I devote time to answering questions in that community.

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So you can head on over to 5.me, slash Molly McPherson and join the PR confidential community.

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I have a free tier, but I also have an all access PR insider tier as well, and that one has the community where we are going to have monthly chats about, you know, the big news stories that we see in the little lessons that we learn about them.

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Not only that in the community, I'm also offering trainings and a lot of the different topics that I talk about and explore.

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So if you work in public relations, crisis communication, marketing, leadership and you want to learn more and also get access and discounted access to a lot of these trainings, then join me in that community there.

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So on September 12th so that is the night this podcast releases I'm going to have a live video chat in the community all access PR insider community in the PR confidential website.

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5.me slash Molly McPherson.

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So join me.

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If you're listening to the episode today on the release day, join me tonight at 7pm Eastern time.

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All right, let's talk about what happened with Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner.

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I'm going to look at it from the aspect of public relations, public relations, spin publicity and crisis management.

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I am doing this way late in the day.

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Today was supposed to be a day firmly dedicated to one project, and yesterday was the same thing.

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But instead I just received so many calls, media press calls about the story and I had to take them because this isn't just your everyday celebrity news story that I'm commenting on.

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I'm not going to be the person that comments on that, but these are the questions about the PR spin behind it, and I am forever fascinated by spin.

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It's what I do for living.

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I debunk the spin, I highlight the spin.

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I don't believe in the spin, at least not in my work, but when I spot it, and when I spot it in a celebrity story, I'm going to call it out.

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That is, if I have the time to post it on TikTok, which I did last week.

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But so let's look at first the timeline of this divorce and when we first started to hear it.

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Now, this was an interesting one because, full disclosure, this is not a story that I am looking at myself.

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I am not tracking what Joe Jonas and the Joe Bros do on a daily basis.

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I am someone who is working in the space of PR.

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But when it does intersect and it's something I have familiarity with, well then I am absolutely all in.

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I have no problems with the Joe Bros.

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So let's start with my disclaimer I like the Jonas Brothers.

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My kids did not fall into true Jonas Brothers fandom when they were young.

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I was certainly aware of them.

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They like them now and I have late teens and early 20s.

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They're all college students and they like their music.

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And the Joe Bros have a space in my heart because they were for fellow award winners of the ad age.

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I received an award where it was the Career Maker award.

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My TikTok and the Joe Bros received that social media image maker award before their work on social media as a band and the grand winner was Drew Barrymore, who we all love.

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So I do have a space in my heart for them because my name was right next to their name and I thought, oh my gosh, how's that for?

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Well, okay, it's the alphabet, but still love them.

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And Sophie Turner okay, full disclosure.

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I could not get into Game of Thrones.

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I couldn't.

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I tried, but the problem was I always watched it too late at night and you have to listen and it's the accents, and I'm not disparaging it.

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I know it's a great show.

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I run to songs on the soundtrack, so I feel like I know it, but I'm not deep into the Game of Thrones, but I am fully familiar with her character and all of it.

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Enough to speak about it.

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All right, so let's go into the timeline of what happened here and let's look at this from my perspective, which is public relations looking for a spin.

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The first time that I even noticed it was a call out from someone tagging me on social media, and it was one user in particular who mentioned to me that the timing of the news about Joe Jonas was suspicious to him because it was on the Friday of a long weekend, and he indicated that.

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You know, I learned this, you know, from Molly B McPherson, and when I saw that, I'm like huh, what's going on here, because I'm always down for these Friday plays and sure enough, we were witnessing news about, you know, a couple where a divorce would be surprising to people who perhaps don't follow blind gossip and I'm gonna come back to blind gossip in a moment.

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But this idea of, you know, the friday news dump is a strategy that goes back in time and this is nothing new.

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People might be new to it because I talk about it on tiktok and on instagram, but there is historical context to it, you know, back in the days you know originated Straight out of washington dc political circles.

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You know anyone working in that area.

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You know of the government and news and that relationship between the two.

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When there was a bad story that needed to get out it wasn't one that was hidden but they wanted to release the news they were going to deploy the tactic to bury the news.

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It's a way to release information discreetly.

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If you release it on a friday afternoon it's less likely to be picked up, so it loses its novelty.

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You know over the weekend, because on fridays when you're looking at traditional news media we have editorial meetings.

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You know that are at ten there at eleven.

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You know in the morning Whether it's newspaper, local news.

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You know national news at a network, whatever it is, they're sitting down for that mid to late morning Editorial meeting like, okay, what's going on today?

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You know what is gonna be our lead story here, what's gonna be top of the fold story, and then they discuss the news and then the news is gathered throughout the day.

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If it is a friday, everybody is at the end of the week and everything is being put to bed and if you have a newspaper, if you have a broadcast coming out.

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There's really not a lot of incentive to break big news on a friday because that's gonna require someone to work overtime and work on the weekends and they already have everything in play, like the newspaper already has a layout and the script is already written, it's already put in the teleprompter so we can insert a story and give it all the research that it needs.

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So by sending it out on a friday whether it's a press release or a statement, people usually have to scramble on that, or the press has to scramble, and what it gives is the weekend now in the traditional news media days.

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So let's say, let's go back to the nineties.

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I was working in Washington DC.

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Back then I lived and worked by that schedule.

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When I started my day every day as a director of communication, my clock was set by the media.

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I knew when to pitch the press and I also knew when it was too late to pitch the press.

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Even if I wanted to send something to a reporter, I knew the times not to do that.

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Even now I know the cadence and the rhythm of reporters when they do their story.

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So when people reach out to me, I gotta get back early because nowadays it's that 24 hour news cycle and they want to whip that story out in a day, and in some cases it has to be vetted, you know, through legal to make sure that everything that's written Is okay to be printed, that there's not gonna be any type of legal blowback.

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But now the friday news drop is still deployed, though, even in twenty twenty three.

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Now, when I do post about it.

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I've mentioned it a few times on tiktok.

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So people associated with me secretly, I absolutely love, I love to be known as someone who exposes a move, a move that is in my industry.

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And have I deployed that in my lifetime?

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Oh my gosh, not by choice, but one time it just comes back to me.

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I have PTSD about having to deal with this, and when I was back working in Washington DC trying to navigate, you know bad stories, but these stories now being dropped in a time of social media, a question that I get a lot Is does it even matter anymore?

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Is there such thing as a friday news dump when there are no deadlines and social media, because everyone is still talking about it through Out the weekend?

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Yes and no.

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Yes, everyone is talking about it, but the people who are talking about it are not editors.

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They're not.

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They don't work at news outlets or they may be following it.

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I mean, they're likely following it and they know I gotta do this on monday, or I know I'm gonna be hit with this on monday, or an editor might see it like that's our story for monday.

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I'm gonna put that out there on monday.

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And the reason why I know this rhythm is because I've dealt with clients and part of my work with them is alerting them to the different gates that we have to get through and what triggers them.

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And I've dealt with these late week problems and I've worked a couple weekends in a row because it kind of gives us this time where we can strategize.

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Not that I like to work weekends by any means, but we can follow chatter, just like reporters do.

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They follow the chatter over the weekend, just like I do is appear strategist.

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I followed over the weekend, but then the moves take place during the week and what I don't want to have happened is I don't want the press to pick up the story, so I want this thing to die out over the weekend, and so my clients.

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But the press is ready to pick up with it and so there's different triggers for me.

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You know the first, you know risk, as I tell them we don't want to breach the wall here where digital news picks us up, and because that's always the first one it's not mainstream media, it's digital.

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And the ones digital picks it up.

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If enough digital people pick it up, then mainstream media will pick it up and then it's over.

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And I definitely had clients where we've breached the mainstream media, but by the time it got there, we had already done the work and so turned out to be a positive story.

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Even though they touched on the negative, it turned out to be positive.

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So it worked perfectly.

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But that is the cycle.

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People who are releasing stories.

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They work with the cycle work.

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Reporters work with the cycle and people like me work with it.

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You know as well.

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Okay, but now with social media, chatter and like, for instance, saturday is like the peak day for Instagram.

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You know I pulled that stat a couple weeks ago.

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I saw that.

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So yes, you're gonna get a lot of chatter, but you're not going to get the press.

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So the timing of this story coming out from Jonas land on a Friday or immediately raises suspicions with me.

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So I just start paying attention and that's when I noticed that the choice of one outlet played a part in this, because this wasn't released everywhere.

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It was just a TMZ story.

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And when it's just a TMZ story, that tells me that someone just spoke with TMZ to tell their story.

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So if you go to the TMZ timeline right now, which is a little off, it's when they update their stories as well.

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But they announced Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner headed for divorce.

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That's like dropping a nugget out there.

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It was not confirmed and who even knows if Sophie Turner even knew this before it came out?

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Who knows?

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Nobody knows what happens behind the scenes, but we can start to figure out what's going on by how the pieces are being played and moved around the board.

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So then we start hearing different news and it's reported again now, two days later, that Joe Jonas has filed divorce from Sophie Turner.

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So what went from hearsay and, I don't know, news on source news.

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It's inside sources but we never have, you know, the true, definitive word on it, like, for example, on People Magazine.

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They said an inside source told people that Jonas and Turner were not separated but have spent the whole summer apart, living separate lives for months.

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So when you read that, that just tells me.

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I don't know if this is fact, but I'm reading this.

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I bet a lot of savvy people on the internet read that news dropped by people that's trying to be still a very formidable digital online magazine, that the inside source is likely a Jonas source.

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It could be someone from their team, it could be their dad, it could be anybody.

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But when we hear inside that language is important, it's not just a source, it's people magazine is trying to lend as much authority and credence to that source as possible without saying who that source is.

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So an inside source says that tells me it's inside the camp, but they're not revealing the name.

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So they're officially not separated because likely Joe Jonas hadn't officially served Sophie Turner or filed the paperwork.

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But they're already doing the spin.

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They spent the whole summer apart.

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They've been living separate lives for months.

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Language like that suggests that someone is already trying to buttress their side of the story.

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Now why do I think it's the Jonas side?

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Well, because the Jonas side is the one that filed for a divorce and these types of moves and these types of words and language where they're trying to frame it as well.

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You know what?

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We weren't together anyway.

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We spent the whole summer apart and we're not going to blame it on Sophie's work schedule.

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But we're going to say you know, we've been living separate lives.

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This type of framing is to shape perception.

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It's to get the public to buy into the side that, oh well, it perfectly makes sense.

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So what could a team do to lend credence to that type of argument?

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Well, if they're living separate lives for months and they spent the whole summer apart, well, who has the kids?

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How do the kids come into this?

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So now we have September 5th.

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Joe Jonas officially files for divorce on the grounds of the marriage being broken and in the filing noted that it is in the best interest of the minor children that the parties have shared parental responsibility.

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So this was a 50-50,.

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No surprise there with an artist who performs on the road.

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But there's other things that are happening.

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Now, september 6th, you know, jonas is performing in Arizona without his wedding ring, so that's one day after filing for divorce.

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So he was performing alongside his brothers, nick and Kevin.

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And of course there were fan-captured videos, because in concerts the best way to break news is to do it at a concert.

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And I just spoke with now one of my favorite digital news reporters.

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I don't want to out the story yet but I'll talk about it.

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But she had asked me about the use of concerts at the particular brand, so I'll probably circle back around to that one when that story comes out.

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Now the stories and the leaks are starting to happen.

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So you know, September 7th, tmz publishes even new reports stating that the following the birth of Jonas and Turner's second baby girl in July, turner was quote, unquote, struggling and quote didn't want to leave their home or quote be photographed to or go to events.

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This type of spin is supported by video that people have seen.

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There was an interview where she said that she's a homebody and Joe Jonas is more social.

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She was on Conan O'Brien, one of my favorites, you know, talking about the fact that they have different lifestyles and you know she's talking about it in a very positive way and it's now being spun against her.

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But read into that Sophie Turner, a mother.

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She has two young kids.

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What does it say?

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That she's likes to be a homebody and she wants to stay home.

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What that tells me is that's a mom staying home with kids, likely alone.

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Where's the spouse?

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So if the spouse were planning these types of stories.

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There's a lot of work to be done.

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What makes it difficult is that if you're going to paint a mother as negligent to their child, well, you got to back it up.

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You've got to back it up, and the only thing they're backing it up with are media interviews stating that she's a homebody.

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But I'm sorry, homebodies to me, particularly their parents, those are the people taking care of the kids.

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All right, you're not hiring a babysitter to be a homebody.

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You're probably happy, you know, being home.

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Okay, so that is another piece of the framing that I see.

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So it is not easy to counter a quote from Sophie Turner when she told Conan O'Brien everything seems to be working out in my favor here, because Joe's a real social butterfly, so I struggle to lock him down and have him just spend time with me.

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It's like prison for him, but it's great for me.

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Something that I said to a reporter today you know about that comment.

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Joe Jonas probably doesn't even know that that comment was out there, or didn't even pay attention to it, or likely didn't even know that that was going to come out.

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If they did, I don't see them going after this whole narrative of her being somewhat of a person who sees parenting a little bit differently.

00:20:31.464 --> 00:20:36.526
So I think that they worked on this quickly and it got a little sloppy for them.

00:20:36.526 --> 00:20:45.682
All right, so now, as we, you know, move through this timeline, this really is a case study in how not to shape narratives.

00:20:46.454 --> 00:20:51.267
Now, in one of my tic-tac posts and I'll include all three of them I did a trio of posts about Joe Jonas.

00:20:51.267 --> 00:20:53.803
There'll be another one where I'll be talking about this podcast.

00:20:53.803 --> 00:20:55.319
That will be the bonus addendum.

00:20:55.319 --> 00:21:02.219
But he's trying to shape narrative and corral and herd public opinion when it's almost impossible to do that.

00:21:02.219 --> 00:21:13.625
And I had stated in one of those tic-tacs my first one if you try too hard to manipulate perception, it's going to blow back on you, because people are savvy nowadays.

00:21:13.625 --> 00:21:17.964
People, especially people on social media oh my gosh, they can pick apart anything.

00:21:17.964 --> 00:21:21.176
And that's exactly what they did Even after my first post.

00:21:21.278 --> 00:21:24.246
A lot of people wrote back or commented but what about Joe?

00:21:24.246 --> 00:21:26.221
He was seen in Austin, texas, wearing a ring.

00:21:26.221 --> 00:21:28.823
Okay, then I went back on tic-tac again.

00:21:28.823 --> 00:21:29.885
Let's talk about it.

00:21:29.885 --> 00:21:37.208
Let's talk about the art of redirection via the tactic of deflection.

00:21:37.208 --> 00:21:47.603
What better way to say that your fingerprints are not on PR spin narratives about a marriage falling apart when you show up in concert wearing your ring.

00:21:47.603 --> 00:21:49.558
How smart is that?

00:21:49.558 --> 00:21:57.664
And it did work for a lot of people because all those people let me know Some of them said hey, you're wrong, your thesis is wrong here.

00:21:57.775 --> 00:21:59.541
They didn't say thesis, but you're wrong.

00:21:59.541 --> 00:22:00.398
He was wearing a ring.

00:22:00.398 --> 00:22:07.465
And some people said I'm confused, he was wearing his ring and that's one of the comments that I took and created a new post about it.

00:22:07.465 --> 00:22:08.859
Like, don't be confused about this.

00:22:08.859 --> 00:22:12.625
This is just spin, because we're using now photographs.

00:22:12.625 --> 00:22:29.509
We're using image as part of the spin and, as it moved forward with the narratives over the weekend, we eventually worked our way towards the end, which was the joint statement that was posted.

00:22:29.796 --> 00:22:36.625
It was posted last Wednesday, so this story was a Friday, saturday, sunday, monday, tuesday story.

00:22:36.625 --> 00:22:47.402
I think the attempt last Friday or the Friday before last was the Jonas team knowing that this divorce was imminent.

00:22:47.402 --> 00:22:53.454
Now what we don't know is why Is there another story?

00:22:53.454 --> 00:22:55.923
Is there another layer to this that could come out later?

00:22:55.923 --> 00:23:12.577
Maybe I'm not saying this, that I know and I don't want to plant a seed, but I'm saying in general, crises have a way of exposing other crises there, so maybe one or the other was with someone else, so there might be someone who comes out of the woodwork on this one, whether that's true or not.

00:23:13.019 --> 00:23:19.298
The wheels were set in motion on Friday and we had throughout the weekend and into Monday.

00:23:19.298 --> 00:23:23.126
It was the spin, the spin, the spin, the spin about.

00:23:23.126 --> 00:23:29.846
Let's paint Sophie as the reason why this marriage was ending.

00:23:29.846 --> 00:23:31.839
It was all her fault.

00:23:31.839 --> 00:23:34.799
Now the other piece of it too is, of course.

00:23:34.799 --> 00:23:38.547
Then we all hear about this ring camera.

00:23:38.547 --> 00:23:43.425
That is the point where I think this is just me.

00:23:43.425 --> 00:23:44.499
This is speculation.

00:23:44.499 --> 00:23:45.659
This is not truth.

00:23:45.659 --> 00:23:50.506
This is only speculation based on my experience.

00:23:50.506 --> 00:23:57.567
But Joe Jonas's team was trying to use time in their favor.

00:23:57.567 --> 00:24:05.063
In a crisis and I say this, I don't say it often enough, but it is true the most critical factor in a crisis is always time.

00:24:05.063 --> 00:24:12.202
It's always time you can work with it or it can work against you, and that has exactly happened with Joe Jonas.

00:24:12.202 --> 00:24:17.305
So I think there was a point when we got to the early week where they knew they were losing it.

00:24:17.305 --> 00:24:18.426
They looked at the sentiment.

00:24:18.426 --> 00:24:26.122
They looked at what people were saying like, okay, now we got to go all in and they threw a Hail Mary pass, and that pass was the ring camera.

00:24:26.122 --> 00:24:34.153
What do you think with Joe Jonas?

00:24:34.153 --> 00:24:39.722
So it's not Joe, but it's multiple people around.

00:24:39.722 --> 00:24:50.959
Joe Tell TMZ that Joe had access to Ring Cam that he said captured Sophie Sane and or doing something that made him realize the marriage was over what?

00:24:51.820 --> 00:24:53.693
So a reporter asked me what do you make of that?

00:24:53.693 --> 00:24:54.978
And I said two things.

00:24:54.978 --> 00:24:56.692
The first thing I didn't want to say, but I said it.

00:24:56.692 --> 00:24:58.557
One it could just be a subtle threat.

00:24:58.557 --> 00:24:59.990
You know Sophie doesn't know.

00:24:59.990 --> 00:25:02.577
Now she has to think, oh my god, what does Joe have on camera?

00:25:02.577 --> 00:25:10.856
You know Joe could just be, you know, playing the odds on this one and just assuming, okay, clearly he doesn't have anything on Ring Cam.

00:25:10.856 --> 00:25:14.857
But he wants to perhaps make Sophie Turner think that he does.

00:25:14.857 --> 00:25:21.198
And if there could be something, then maybe this narrative will turn in favor of just Sophie.

00:25:21.578 --> 00:25:28.211
But based on the statement, I think that that is not the case and they filed for divorce because of that.

00:25:28.211 --> 00:25:32.951
Now it could be an overt threat to Sophie saying we've got this and you know what this is.

00:25:32.951 --> 00:25:37.355
You know exactly what this is and we're gonna release it if you don't come to the table and have a divorce here.

00:25:37.355 --> 00:25:40.413
I don't know, but it doesn't feel like that.

00:25:40.413 --> 00:25:47.101
It doesn't feel like that because in the statement we have the sources and it's the and slash, or it's the and or.

00:25:47.101 --> 00:25:48.484
What does that mean?

00:25:48.484 --> 00:26:08.711
Either say it Like if it really was something and Joe really had evidence that multiple sources would say that he had access to a Ring Cam that said he captured Sophie saying something that made him realize definitively the marriage was over, or that he spotted Sophie do something that made him realize this is over.

00:26:08.711 --> 00:26:12.028
That's different language, right, other than saying and or.

00:26:12.028 --> 00:26:12.990
No one speaks like that.

00:26:12.990 --> 00:26:14.194
We didn't call it TMZ.

00:26:14.194 --> 00:26:16.141
Hey, I got some scoop.

00:26:16.141 --> 00:26:25.266
Sophie either said or and did something, or she did not, and maybe it's this or not.

00:26:25.266 --> 00:26:30.083
Stop, no one talks that way, but people write that way strategically.

00:26:30.083 --> 00:26:46.117
And TMZ also reported that Joe had been in touch with at least two divorce lawyers from the previous week and both lawyers, interestingly, are in Los Angeles, yet he decided to file these docs Tuesday in Florida.

00:26:46.117 --> 00:26:49.990
So then on Wednesday we have the joint statement.

00:26:50.651 --> 00:26:54.921
Now I had posted something to TikTok about the joint statement.

00:26:54.921 --> 00:27:06.257
A lot of people commented on it and it received a different almost I don't know thread of what I was getting to at the very end.

00:27:06.257 --> 00:27:19.383
But let's talk about the statement, let's draw nuances from it and let's read between the lines, so quickly, the statement from the two of us after four wonderful years of marriage, we have mutually decided to amicably end our marriage.

00:27:19.383 --> 00:27:31.833
There are many speculative narratives as to why, but comma, truly, this is a united decision and we sincerely hope that everyone can respect our wishes for privacy for us and our children.

00:27:31.833 --> 00:27:34.163
There's a lot to pull from that statement.

00:27:34.163 --> 00:27:37.895
Now, again, let's clarify I don't know anything that happened behind the scenes.

00:27:37.895 --> 00:27:45.698
I'm only looking at this as someone who writes statements and who's written a quote-unquote separation statement or two in their career.

00:27:45.698 --> 00:27:50.172
I want to give thought to what I see when I see a statement like this.

00:27:51.035 --> 00:27:52.799
Now, first of all, let's just touch on the writing.

00:27:52.799 --> 00:28:00.284
I don't like to publicly come out and dunk on anyone, particularly people who are in my field, so someone who has to write a statement.

00:28:00.284 --> 00:28:01.692
I don't want to come after them.

00:28:01.692 --> 00:28:07.877
I want to share my feelings for them and my respect, because it's not easy doing this at all.

00:28:07.877 --> 00:28:20.972
So I mean, there are statements that I've had that are public, that have gone out there, that I did not like because my words were mangled and there have been times where my words have gone out there and they've been precise.

00:28:20.972 --> 00:28:27.634
And what's interesting is I'll see my work sprinkled in social media and when people comment on it.

00:28:27.634 --> 00:28:40.508
And the best, most meta move is when people tag me on my own statements that I've worked on with a client and they'll say you know, at Molly B McPherson, what do you think of this statement?

00:28:40.508 --> 00:28:41.431
I think it's crap.

00:28:41.431 --> 00:28:44.398
Molly B McPherson would never write a statement like this.

00:28:44.398 --> 00:28:48.537
Or Molly B McPherson, tell me, or tell us what this statement means.

00:28:48.537 --> 00:28:51.830
I already did and it's right there.

00:28:51.830 --> 00:28:52.532
You're reading it.

00:28:52.532 --> 00:28:55.682
Isn't it funny how TikTok works and social media?

00:28:55.682 --> 00:28:57.655
Okay, so let's read between the lines.

00:28:57.655 --> 00:29:02.951
So this statement is designed to express unity and respect.

00:29:02.951 --> 00:29:04.415
Okay, it just is.

00:29:04.516 --> 00:29:08.472
It's written that way, but the writing, like I said, is clunky.

00:29:08.472 --> 00:29:11.019
First sentence the word marriage is in there.

00:29:11.019 --> 00:29:15.372
Twice, after four wonderful years of marriage, we have usually decided to amicably end our marriage.

00:29:15.372 --> 00:29:19.751
No one writes like that unless it's heavily edited and more people are involved.

00:29:19.751 --> 00:29:20.656
Now my TikTok.

00:29:20.656 --> 00:29:21.803
I just call this redlining.

00:29:21.803 --> 00:29:25.824
That's the word that I use, but if it's on a Google Doc, I guess it would be called greenlining.

00:29:25.824 --> 00:29:28.416
But redlining is when you're editing a paper.

00:29:28.416 --> 00:29:33.077
I, in my college course, I have a red pen and I edit, you know, actual paper.

00:29:33.077 --> 00:29:34.545
It's the same thing.

00:29:34.545 --> 00:29:41.346
It just feels like too many people got involved and we came out with that absolutely clunky sentence.

00:29:41.346 --> 00:29:48.916
Then the next sentence there are many speculative narratives as to why, but comma, the comma should be after why not?

00:29:48.916 --> 00:29:55.219
But there are many speculative narratives as to why comma but truly comma.

00:29:55.219 --> 00:29:57.925
This is where this is a united decision.

00:29:57.925 --> 00:30:06.384
I do period, but I didn't write this, and we sincerely hope that everyone can respect our wishes for privacy for us and our children.

00:30:06.384 --> 00:30:08.373
So that's a good line, because that's good.

00:30:09.175 --> 00:30:13.412
Now, writing aside, it does follow my framework Own it, explain it, promise it.

00:30:13.412 --> 00:30:14.174
You know, own it.

00:30:14.174 --> 00:30:16.192
After four years of marriage, they're getting divorced.

00:30:16.192 --> 00:30:18.884
They didn't say the word divorce, they didn't say it.

00:30:18.884 --> 00:30:25.075
And many times the reason why you don't see the word divorce is because it's a word with sharp edges.

00:30:25.075 --> 00:30:26.601
Divorce hurts people.

00:30:26.601 --> 00:30:29.431
Children of divorce do not like the word divorce.

00:30:29.431 --> 00:30:33.340
People who, just you know, think am I going to get divorced?

00:30:33.340 --> 00:30:36.384
Or when someone gets divorced, it hurts them if they're surprised by it.

00:30:36.384 --> 00:30:42.659
Or people who think, god, I think I have to get divorced, like it takes them a long time to actually wrap their brain around the idea.

00:30:42.659 --> 00:30:48.384
So the word is a highly highly charged word, so I don't see any problem with not having it in there.

00:30:48.384 --> 00:30:52.846
It needs to be written with a soft touch, particularly when there are kids involved.

00:30:52.846 --> 00:31:01.442
So that's why I do respect the soft landing of this message, because they do have kids and their kids someday are going to read this message.

00:31:01.442 --> 00:31:02.305
Okay.

00:31:02.305 --> 00:31:07.605
So, reading between the lines, there are many speculative narratives as to why.

00:31:07.605 --> 00:31:18.940
When I see that and what I said on TikTok, that felt to me like it was written in a way originally where it wasn't there.

00:31:20.131 --> 00:31:30.580
And or Sophie Turner wanted to address all of the negative press about her and she knows that Jonas team camp did it.

00:31:30.580 --> 00:31:36.295
She knows that Her team knows that she likely wanted to address that, because I just know that from my work.

00:31:36.295 --> 00:31:46.236
Every client I have who's been disparaged or just dragged online, they always want me to defend them Publicly, like how do we get this out?

00:31:46.236 --> 00:31:52.535
And I always tell them we don't want to do that, we don't want to get into the fray and into the mud with them, we just don't, and it's always a back and forth.

00:31:52.535 --> 00:32:00.393
I feel that this happened here too, but Sophie Turner saying something to the effect you said I was a bad mother, how dare you?

00:32:00.393 --> 00:32:02.596
So you need to address it.

00:32:02.596 --> 00:32:13.057
And they probably came to a place where speculative narratives was agreed upon Cause, even though it's implied, that social media commentary created speculative narratives.

00:32:13.057 --> 00:32:13.940
You know which is true.

00:32:13.940 --> 00:32:15.442
I'm one of them, I'm a part of it.

00:32:15.442 --> 00:32:17.296
This whole podcast is speculation.

00:32:17.296 --> 00:32:27.199
But the mud throne and the PR spin from the Jonas camp is likely what she's referring to, because those are narratives.

00:32:27.199 --> 00:32:29.796
So it's less about speculative but more about the word narratives.

00:32:29.796 --> 00:32:35.178
And you, joe, my friend, are the one who threw it, so I believe that that was in their intention.

00:32:35.690 --> 00:32:45.659
Also, when I see word choice like amicably and united, the use of terms like that, you know they're there to paint a picture of harmony and mutual agreement in this decision to part ways.

00:32:45.659 --> 00:32:54.319
However, when there's so much emphasis on it, it's just, it's a hint to what is likely happening behind the scenes.

00:32:54.319 --> 00:32:56.935
It's the counter Okay, it's the complete opposite.

00:32:56.935 --> 00:33:07.817
So whenever someone thrust the word amicably, like even in my work, when someone insists on the word amicably, it's always because it's not amicable, but we need to tell people it's amicable.

00:33:07.817 --> 00:33:12.557
So we have to use the word amicable and in this case they did it twice.

00:33:12.557 --> 00:33:15.993
We're mutually decided it's amicable.

00:33:15.993 --> 00:33:21.695
They want unity in all of this, this united decision.

00:33:21.695 --> 00:33:22.819
They said it more than once.

00:33:22.819 --> 00:33:25.477
You don't have to go crazy on this.

00:33:25.477 --> 00:33:33.016
You have a joint statement that in and of itself shows that you're united on this mutual decision.

00:33:33.016 --> 00:33:37.198
Okay, you don't need to tell us one, two, three, four times in there.

00:33:37.198 --> 00:33:45.358
The more I see it, the more emphasis on it, the more it tells me it's not true and this is savage behind the scene.

00:33:46.029 --> 00:33:48.798
Okay, a common theme in crisis comms is respecting privacy.

00:33:48.798 --> 00:33:50.596
We love this in statements.

00:33:50.596 --> 00:33:51.996
We want to keep it in statements.

00:33:51.996 --> 00:33:56.472
It controls a narrative, but it's also there to protect not just them but their children.

00:33:56.472 --> 00:34:00.640
We want them to have that protection and privacy.

00:34:00.640 --> 00:34:01.894
They deserve that.

00:34:01.894 --> 00:34:09.536
Their kids deserve that and that's why with divorce statements, they're weighed a little bit differently, because there are kids involved.

00:34:09.536 --> 00:34:11.757
So this could have been a more harsher statement.

00:34:11.757 --> 00:34:16.215
But because they have young kids, they want it to be softer and for that I respect it.

00:34:16.215 --> 00:34:27.900
But when I see speculative narratives to me, that subtext okay, that is subtext from Sophie's team addressing that mud was thrown.

00:34:27.900 --> 00:34:29.514
This whole statement is neutral.

00:34:29.514 --> 00:34:33.438
Fine, but you've got to come clean on that.

00:34:33.690 --> 00:34:45.378
Now let's look at the public reception and perception of this whole sorted affair, from the Friday drop to the carefully constructed statement.

00:34:45.378 --> 00:35:10.115
Was it all crafted to present a dignified exit from the marriage or was it to influence the public's perception about both sides, one more favorably left set one, or was it work to influence the public perception about both sides, one in a more positive manner and the other less so?

00:35:10.115 --> 00:35:11.733
Based on?

00:35:11.733 --> 00:35:18.197
Well, the reception on TikTok is, oh my gosh, the needle is way over on team Sophie.

00:35:18.197 --> 00:35:25.958
Most of the response that I saw now I know it's weighted because of algorithms, but most of the response was for pro Sophie.

00:35:25.958 --> 00:35:39.018
I did get a couple you know Jonas in there, definitely, but the reception has landed on the Sophie Turner side, also because of the amount of press calls that I've received just about this topic.

00:35:39.018 --> 00:35:44.416
Everybody wants to know about the PR spin behind Joe Jonas everybody, which makes sense, because that's what I was talking about.

00:35:44.416 --> 00:35:48.898
But still all the questions we're leading to why did this not work for Joe Jonas?

00:35:49.811 --> 00:36:00.637
And the reason why I feel so strongly about this is because of the spin that's witnessed in the beginning of it and also the inference from the silence.

00:36:00.637 --> 00:36:05.853
Sophie Turner maintained relative silence through all of it.

00:36:05.853 --> 00:36:28.719
All of it, and what I said in my TikTok post was this whenever there's a divorce so whether it's in the celebrity realm or in the personal realm, in the private life, people that you know, it could be your parents, it could be your friends, it could be you Look for the person who is not spinning the stories, look for the person who's silent on a lot of these issues.

00:36:28.719 --> 00:36:42.021
That's likely the person who is respecting not only themselves but likely children, but also is just respecting boundaries of kindness.

00:36:42.021 --> 00:36:48.500
The person in a divorce an acrimonious one that is spinning, that is telling narratives.

00:36:48.500 --> 00:36:57.420
So in a celebrity realm, you're getting drops to TMZ and People Magazine, but in the personal realm, it's Facebook, social media.

00:36:57.420 --> 00:37:10.458
Maybe they're not outrightly stating it, but there could be one parent All of a sudden, the absent parent, where parent that parent was never around, but all of a sudden on Facebook there's a million photos of that parent with their kids.

00:37:10.458 --> 00:37:14.974
Parent of the year, disney parent I'm always with my kids.

00:37:14.974 --> 00:37:20.398
That's what you'll notice in these divorces Someone is spinning to reshape the narrative.

00:37:20.398 --> 00:37:22.635
Look for the person spinning.

00:37:22.635 --> 00:37:34.833
Look for the person shifting the narrative, whether it's with their own family or kids Social media I'm the best parent in the world and then dropping these little stories about that other person.

00:37:35.510 --> 00:37:38.097
Oftentimes in divorce there's just control.

00:37:38.097 --> 00:37:45.976
And some people didn't mention like, well, my mom blabbed around town and my dad cheated on her and she didn't remain silent.

00:37:45.976 --> 00:37:48.012
But I don't think she was wrong, she was still the victim.

00:37:48.012 --> 00:37:49.378
Yeah, that one's true.

00:37:49.378 --> 00:37:58.556
That's like a different scenario, because here we're talking about when someone kind of plots that divorce, when an affair is discovered, yeah, you can do one of two things.

00:37:58.556 --> 00:38:00.577
I mean, still being silent would still be.

00:38:00.577 --> 00:38:02.155
Ooh, that would be a power move.

00:38:02.155 --> 00:38:12.961
But it's understandable if someone is gonna go nutty because and then just start blabbing it and kind of do the hot wash of oh my gosh, I've been cheated on.

00:38:12.961 --> 00:38:15.378
That's hard to keep in some time, I think, for some people.

00:38:15.378 --> 00:38:16.594
So I understand it.

00:38:16.594 --> 00:38:20.434
But it's in the silence All the power lies.

00:38:20.434 --> 00:38:25.157
It is in the silence, and so let's now move on.

00:38:25.289 --> 00:38:30.255
Let's look at why that is such an effective solution, no matter what you're doing.

00:38:30.255 --> 00:38:41.996
So, whether it's a celebrity derailment of a marriage or some relationship, so some friction out there that's happening, or conflict, or it happens in the real space.

00:38:41.996 --> 00:38:44.617
What is it that people wanna see?

00:38:44.617 --> 00:38:49.737
A publicist is gonna give the same advice that a therapist would give in counseling.

00:38:49.737 --> 00:38:51.215
It's the same advice.

00:38:51.929 --> 00:38:59.577
One would be crafting a united front, which is what Joe and Sophie did, but only at the very end.

00:38:59.577 --> 00:39:02.338
All of this would have gone away for Joe Jonas.

00:39:02.338 --> 00:39:08.338

258: Behind the Words: Unveiling the Spin and Subtext in the Jonas-Turner Divorce

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